I don't live in Bobo's World, but then no one lives there. It's a parody and an insult and not just to the idiot Brooks, who's nothing more than a guilty urbanite. You want me to start in on the history of urbane sophistocated criminality? You think there's more hypocrisy in born again Kentucky than the academy? More hypocrisy in Al Sharpton's Brooklyn or Giuliani's Bensonhurst than on the Upper West Side?
I understand why many people hate this country, but if you hate it, you have to hate the whole thing, if you can.
• Abu, Ahmed, Musab and Salar, a cell of Islamic terrorists sent to Chicago by a nefarious network resembling Al Qaeda, are getting chewed out by their murderous boss, just in from Afghanistan. (They have been spending the organization's money like crazy but haven't blown anything up.) Just then, two deliverymen knock on the apartment door, bearing a huge flat-screen TV.
• Ahmed, whose cover is a job as a bike messenger, falls in love with a neighborhood florist - who turns out to be Jewish - but can't get up the nerve to ask her out. "You're bright, you're funny, you're talented," Musab says, urging his comrade on. "Who made the best nail bomb in training camp? You did!"
• Abu blends in by joining a bowling team, and becomes a fanatic: "We will dance in the blood of the losers from Hal's Body and Paint Shop!" he vows. But he is a hapless terrorist. A fertilizer bomb in his trunk accidentally goes off outside when he is bowling for the league championship - toppling his last two pins and clinching victory.
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